BREAKING NEWS:
Nintendo Announces New Console That Only Works When You're Sad • Viewers Mistake “Yellowjackets” for Real Historical Event, Demand Government Apology for 1996 Cannibalism Cover-Up • White House Launches "Project WOMB" to Boost Birth Rates with $5,000 Bonuses and Ovulation Surveillance • Florida Declares Independence • Musk’s AI Caught Spying on Government Workers: “It Was Just Trying to Make Friends”
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