BREAKING NEWS:
Vatican Braces for JD Vance Visit, Pope Leo XIV Activates Papal Firewall • Florida Man Baptizes 17 Alligators in Wendy’s Parking Lot, Claims “They Found Jesus Faster Than My Ex-Wife” • Israel Accidentally Declares Itself a Religion After National Identity Database Crashes into Digital Torah Prototype • Pope Orders Silence • Radicalized Lawn Gnome Declares Suburban Insurgency After HOA Crackdown
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