Gaza City, May 27, 2025 —
A commercial flight from Milan to Tel Aviv startled geopolitical observers and local goat herders alike yesterday when it accidentally landed in the Gaza Strip, mistaking an unfinished road and several solar panels for a runway.

The pilot of the Air Mishap flight 972, Captain Luca Cattaneo, said in a now-deleted Instagram Live:

“We saw flat ground, blinking lights, and honestly—everyone was asleep. It looked legal.”

The aircraft, a Boeing 737 retrofitted with questionable in-flight Wi-Fi and strong Catholic guilt, touched down near the Al-Zeitoun district, where confused passengers were greeted not by customs officers, but by a group of bewildered children kicking a deflated soccer ball.

✈️ TECHNICALLY AN AIRPORT

Air Mishap initially defended the landing, claiming the “coordinates matched a secondary Israeli airstrip”, but later admitted their map software had auto-corrected “Ben Gurion” to “Begin Guerrilla Zone.”

“We don’t use Google Maps anymore,” said airline spokesperson Miriam Feldblum.
“We now rely on something called ‘Crowdsourced Cartography for Peace™’.”

The pilot reportedly mistook an LED-lit chicken farm for a runway guidance system and was allegedly encouraged by in-flight A.I. assistant “SHALOM-E”, who reassured him:

“Approach stable. Conflict proximity: normal.”

🧯 WELCOME TO GAZA: PLEASE REMAIN SEATED

Passengers were asked to remain calm while the flight crew read from an emergency script that included the phrases:

  • “This is probably fine.”

  • “At least it’s not Damascus.”

  • “Try not to tweet.”

One business-class passenger, Marta B., live-posted the landing:

“I thought the descent was weird, but then the flight attendant handed me a helmet and said ‘Mazal… ish.’”

Passengers were quickly escorted to a makeshift terminal (a former Internet café with two working fans) while negotiators from three NGOs and a startup incubator arrived via donkey.

📡 ISRAELI RESPONSE: “OUR BAD, KINDA.”

Israeli officials called the incident a “navigational hiccup within a complex spiritual map,” and commended the pilot for his “commitment to regional unpredictability.”

Prime Minister Netanyahu issued a brief statement:

“Mistakes happen. But only on the way in.”

Meanwhile, Hamas media claimed victory, releasing footage of the plane landing with the caption:

“Another Zionist incursion neutralized by… poor judgment.”

🎫 AIRLINE OFFERS COMPENSATION

In response to backlash, Air Mishap has offered affected passengers a voucher worth 30% off their next accidental landing, redeemable only on flights that don’t include “airspace litigation.”

Captain Cattaneo has been suspended pending review, though insiders report he has already received offers from Frontier Airlines and a Romanian paragliding club.

🧳 WHAT’S NEXT

A United Nations committee is set to review the incident and may introduce mandatory reality checks for all airline navigation software. In the meantime, Air Mishap has renamed the route:

"Flight 972B: Choose Your Own Landing."

It now includes an optional “random descent mode,” beloved by thrill-seekers, diplomats in midlife crisis, and TikTok influencers with too much mileage.