News so fake, it might as well be real

BREAKING NEWS:
Israel Accidentally Declares Itself a Religion After National Identity Database Crashes into Digital Torah Prototype • The Empathy Fugitive: How One ICE Agent Felt Something and Had to Flee • Belichick’s Girlfriend Enters Miss Maine Pageant: “I Just Want a Ring He’ll Actually Give Me” • Vatican Braces for JD Vance Visit, Pope Leo XIV Activates Papal Firewall • White House Launches "Project WOMB" to Boost Birth Rates with $5,000 Bonuses and Ovulation Surveillance
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