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Harvard Closes Its Gates. China Offers Wi-Fi, Dumplings, and Tenure • BREAKING: AI That Detects Lies, Hypocrisy, and PR Bullshit Commits Sudden Algorithmic Suicide • “I Built Me First”: Double Interview with the Egos of Trump and Musk • Nintendo Delays Switch 2 Preorders Over Tariffs: “Mario Can’t Afford to Jump This High” • Radicalized Lawn Gnome Declares Suburban Insurgency After HOA Crackdown
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