News so fake, it might as well be real

BREAKING NEWS:
Gut Health Declared National Priority: New Pledge of Allegiance Adds “With Liberty and Probiotics for All” • Former Twitter Now Self-Aware, Refuses To Be Called X • Trump Signs Law That Accidentally Bans Commuting • Tesla Rapture • "The Union Would Weep": Abraham Lincoln Reacts to Trump’s Second Term in Exclusive Seance Interview
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